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Fart Excuses

  1. I needed an extra boost to get up
  2. Pardon, but who just died? It smells like a rotting corpse in here!
  3. Speak to me, oh toothless one. Share your wisdom.
  4. There goes my lunch from yesterday!
  5. He who smelt it, dealt it.
  6. Who farted?
  7. #DriveBy
  8. I may or may not have farted out a rainbow, because I’m a unicorn!
  9. All things must pass
  10. If you were stuck in there, you’d want out too.
  11. It was me!
  12. That’s gonna itch when it dries
  13. Did you hear that!?
  14. Did I do that?
    Urcle farted
  15. Little too much choke, I think I flooded it.
  16. Whoops, I sharted!
  17. Is it just me or is it windy here
  18. Better to fart and feel the shame than hold it in and feel the pain.
  19. Better out than in
  20. Can anyone smell a gas leak?
  21. Do you smell strawberry bubblegum?
  22. What the heck was that?
  23. [Insert pet’s name here]!
  24. Look at an innocent party and say, “bless you”
  25. “Oh, ducks are out” and then scan the sky
  26. Don’t go spreading that around.